Proving My Strength
by Toazzy-chan
Summary: Shikamaru. I finally understand." "What do you finally understand, you troublesome woman?" "Why you watch the clouds..." Rated M just to be safe. Better than it sounds. Slight OOC. Very slight.
1. Coming Home A Little To Late

_**A/N:**_ Holy Bananas!!! I _**FINALLY**_ got my computer back! For those of you out there that are unaware of what I am speaking of, my computer had a virus. I've been sneaking time on my mom's laptop (meant for her job) just to keep my loyal readers updated on the events involving my computer. It's like 4:21am and I got class in four and a half hours. Then I have a lunch date with my mom. Then I have to go with my mom down to Charter and get us a home phone, cable, and faster internet. My internet connection sucks. 4realz. Slow as hell. And it's wireless. So ya. You can just imagine the frustration of high-speed internet not being high-speed. Anywayz! After the Charter biz, I have about an hour to finally get some sleep. Then at 6pm-9pm I have another class I have to attend. Then I get to come home and check my email and stuff, quickly before going to bed.

My computer had 12 viruses and 37 different website hacker pplz trying to access any and all of my information. Oh, and we can't forget all the cookies it had. Hundreds and hundreds of cookies. And I'm not talking about the kind you eat either. Lolz! So ya. My computer was seriously jacked up. For the last couple months it just sat in my room. Then my mom finally got fed up with me using her laptop all the time and had my computer taken in to get fixed.

Long story short, my computer is up and running again. This finished two-shot is merely my way of asking for forgiveness for my lack of updating. Oh and it's also a brib to forgive me if I don't update soon after this. My life has turned hectic. I'm lucky I'm typing this now. Plz forgive me for past and future behaviour.

_**Dedication:**_ To all my loyal readers who stuck by my side and waited patiently for me to update. Thank you all. This is for you! My readers who reviewed and favorited! Lolz!

_**Disclaimer:**_ I own nothing. Unless you count the plot of this fic.... Oh well! Don't sue! No flamers! Just reviews! Happy, joyous reviews! Lolz!

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_**Warning!!!:**_ _**Character Death! You have been warned!**_

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My hair has leaves, grass, and debris tangled in it, as it lies scattered around my shoulders. Blood is splattered all over my body. Dirt is caked to my skin.

-

Never, in a million years, did I ever think I would be proving my strength like this. I had become the number one ninja in all of Konaha. I had become the captain of the number one ANBU sqaud in all of Konaha. I had even become the head of the hospital in Konaha.

-

None of it matters. He doesn't care. He doesn't care if I surpassed a lengendary sanin. I'm still weak in his eyes. Still the no good fan. Who, in his eyes, will be nothing more than that. Weak.

-

My left leg and right arm. Those are the limbs I can no longer feel. I still can't see the gates. Trees and shrubs are all that surround me. Inner me died along with the screams of dying people over six hours ago.

-

Just a little longer. That's what I keep telling myself, even now, as night begins to fall yet again. I've been trying to get back to Konaha for the past four days. Dragging my numb and injured body along the forest floor. Never giving up.

-

It's been twelve days since I started my journey back home. Half my body is numb. My chakra is barely keeping me alive. I refuse to rest. I refuse to stop. I refuse to give up. I can't give up. I won't give up. I've made it this far, without his help. Without anyone's help. I know I look pathetic as I drag my half dead body back to the gates of my home.

-

He'll be there. I know he will. He'll be walking by and see me. He'll see me crawling back to Konaha, half alive, half dead. He'll call me weak. He'll roll his eyes. He'll walk away and leave me to die. He's cold and uncaring like that. He always has been. Then again, nobody has ever seen me looking anything like this. I'm never this injured. He knows this, but like I said before, he won't care.

-

The gates! I see them! "Everyone. I'm finally home." My voice is nothing more than a hushed, harsh, dry whisper. I don't sound like myself. Seeing the gates, it gave me more hope than I have felt in years. I force my body to move faster and farther. I'm just a few feet away. Just a few feet more and I can finally rest. Just a few feet more and.....

-

I was wrong about him being there. He's not at the gates, looking right at me. He isn't staring at me with a shocked gaze. I still refuse to give up. I refuse to recieve help. I refuse to look sad that he's not there.

-

I've made it! I'm home! I managed to not only make it through the gates of Konaha, but I was able to drag myself to my house and up to my bedroom. I shut the door quietly behind me. Then I roll myself over onto my back and stare up at my bedroom ceiling. I should be hearing footsteps. Lots of them. I should feel hands grasping onto me. People shouting to me. People trying to heal me. Instead I feel only pain and hear my own silent sobs. My hands reach to the drawer beside me. I pull out my dairy.

-

_Dear Diary,_

_This is how I envisioned my death._

_-_

_Ino. Shikamaru. Chouji. Naruto. Sasuke. Hinata. Kiba. Shino. Neji. Tenten. Lee. Asuma. Kurenai. Gai. Tsunade. Shizune. Iruka. Yamoto. Heck, even the always late Kakashi. They are all standing around me, trying to get me to respond to something. Trying to make sure, I'll make it through this. I don't see them though. I only pay attention to the clouds above us._

_-_

_"Shikamaru. I finally understand." Gasps and relieved voices are heard. "What do you finally understand, you troublesome woman?" I slowly push myself up onto my elbows. Tsunade and Shizune started to panic when I moved. I simply lifted my right hand to silence them. Then I look at Shikamaru and smile one of my rare true smiles. "Why you watch the clouds. It gives a feeling of freedom. You feel like your floating amoung them. All your pain, love, tears, injuries, memories, they're all forgotten. All that matters are the clouds and that freeing feeling you get from watching them." Shikamaru nodded his approval of what I had declared._

_-_

_This hurts but I have to get this out. I have to. Most likely Kakashi-sensei, Naruto, Ino, or even my parents will find this dairy and all my others. They need to know what happened and how I wished my last minutes of life could have been spent._

_-_

_My smile turns into a frown and I look Tsunade directly in the eyes. She noticed and silenced everyone around us with the raise of her left hand. "Hokage-sama. Mission accomplished." Her shock was evident. Her sharp intake of breath was not unnoticed. She let a single tear fall and a true smile grace her face. Both gestures meant for me. She was shocked. She was happy. But most of all, she was proud. Proud of me._

_-_

_He just had to choice that moment to snap out of his shock. "Sakura?" He knelt down beside me and pulled me into a tight embrace. His actions caused me to flinch. He noticed and pulled back, not letting go of me completely. "Are you going to be okay? How did you get injured this badly? Are you in any pain, at all? How long have you been injured for? How long were you crawling like that? What did you mean by mission accomplished? What happened??"_

_-_

_Everyone gave him a weird, shocked look of sorts. He NEVER talks. He NEVER shows his emotions. And he MOST certainly NEVER touchs anyone. I ignore him. He still doesn't let go. Instead, he pulls me into his chest for another embrace. "Tsunade? These injuries were inflicted upon my person thirteen days ago. I've dragged my numb, unfeeling, half-dead body across the forest floors every day since then. I didn't stop to rest even once. I forced myself to keep going." _

_-_

_My body shook violently from a sudden burst of coughing. Blood flowed freely out of my mouth once the violent attack ceased. Sasuke looked at me with scared eyes. He was scared for my life. The love in his eyes was evident as well as shock, fear, and worry._

_-_

Blood splatters onto my dairy. It is flowing freely from my mouth like I wrote down. The violent coughing attack only added to my pain.

-

_"I forced myself to push on. I refused to give up. I refused to die before I made it back home. I'm back now. My entire body is numb. I can't feel anything. I'm dying Tsunade. The thing is, I'm not afraid. I know not a single person in this village is going to miss me. I know they'll never remember me or my teammates that died on this mission. Our last mission in this lifetime. We took out the Akatsuki. Every single one of them. Even Itachi. I'm afraid I accomplished one of Sasuke's life-long goals for him. I made sure Itachi suffered before he died. Sasuke. You can move on and love someone now."_

_-_

_"With in the next few minutes, I'm going to be dead."_

_-_

_It's true. Once this entry is done. I'm going to be dead. My bed has never looked more inviting._

_-_

_He looked like a puppy that got ran over, just then. I felt another violent wave of pain rack through my body. "Sasuke promise me something. Promise me you won't go trying to seek revenge. I avenged myself, already. Promise you'll be more social, no matter how annoying it may be. Promise you'll stay alive for me. Promise me you'll find another beautiful girl that you will fall in love with and eventually marry. Promise to restore your clan with her, whoever she may be. Most of all, promise me you'll NEVER give up on life, our friends, your future family, and Konaha. Promise me all that, Sasuke. Please..."_

_-_

_That's it. Once this entry is done, I'm going to use the last of my strength to get on my bed._

_-_

_I could feel a single tear roll down my battered cheek as Sasuke looked me in the eyes and promised me everything I wanted him to. After He promised, he pull me in for my first and last kiss. We both closed our eyes and I felt myself fading away. I felt him choke out a sob and I heard everyone around us crying their eyes out as well._

_-_

_Naruto was wailing loudly and clinging to Hinata. Sasuke clung to my cold lifeless body and sobbed his heart out. Tenten clung to Neji as they both cried silently. The same was for Ino, Kiba, Shino, and Akamaru. Kakashi held onto a hysterical Shizune. Genma cried silently. Iruka fell to the ground balling. _

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Then everything became lost to me. I was in a very dark place. I could see a single water drop fall and hit, what I assumed, was the ground. The impact caused ripples of water to show. I felt myself start to drown in the darkness and I heard myself let out a bone-chilling scream as my life flashed before my eyes and I was hurtled downwards through the pitch black plane. Then I felt nothing. I saw nothing. I was nothing. Death. I realized is just a new begining. Light flooded the plane and I let out a loud cry in shock.

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Toazzy-chan: Well? That's the first chappy of this happy two-shot. For those of you who couldn't figure it out, this is all Sakura's POV. Next Chapter will bounce back and forther from Tsunade's POV to Third person. Review please!


	2. The Announcement & Memories

_**Disclaimer:**_ I own nothing. Unless you count the plot of this fic.... Oh well! Don't sue! No flamers! Just reviews! Happy, joyous reviews! Lolz!

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_**Warning!!!:**_ _**Character Death! You have been warned!**_

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It was midnight when Tsunade got the call. She was sleeping. Simply enjoying the simple pleasures a good night's rest could give someone. She never expected this to happen. **She was so innocent.** When had it happened? **So heartbreakingly kind.** Who would do this to her? **She was too special.** Who could be so cruel? **She was too **_**beautiful**. _How could someone do this to the gorgeous medic?

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"Her parents found her." They really shouldn't have been the ones to find her. The sight was one that even she- a woman who had killed many and seen the deaths of hundreds before her eyes- would be haunted by for the rest of her life. "She had been gone for nearly a minute when they found her. Her left leg and right arm have been dead for at least a week, if not longer." _Everyone was too late._ _As usual._

**-**

**If her parents had found her a few minutes sooner....**

**If the guards at the gates had only noticed her enter the village....**

**If someone had only noticed her making her way home.....**

**If someone had heard her.....**

**-**

_"Would you go on a mission with me, Kaka-Sensei? I really need a team. It's an important ANBU mission." Her last words towards him. Why did he ignore her? Her last cry out for help. Icha Icha Paradise was more important than making sure she came back safely from a dangerous mission. Her eyes held hope, as she gazed up at him. He didn't even spare her a glance when he gave her his answer. "I am busy." Liar. His nose was in his dirty orange book as usual. Her smile brightened and her head tilted to the side. "You'll never change, will you Kaka-sensei?"_

_Her small giggle pulled his attention to her form, on the ground below the tree he was perched on. Her smile was true and full of happiness. She hasn't smiled like that, since before Sasuke returned to the village. He couldn't help but smile back. "Hey? Saku-chan? Do you wanna train with me for a little while? I would really like to see how much you have improved over the years."_

_With his book away, true smiles on both their faces, he jumped down from his perch and landed in front of her. Her smile seemed to brighten even more and decided to shine through to her eyes. He pulled down his mask for the first time ever. Her eyes widened and a gasp escaped her open mouth. She started gaping like a fish, before she promptly fainted and he had to carry her home to her parents. She left the next morning without saying a word to anyone._

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**_...then maybe she would still be alive. Sakura...._**

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"Sakura-chan?" Sakura looked over at Naruto and Hinata. They were cuddling, while looking up at the stars in the sky. Rookie nine & Team Gai were camping out on Team Seven's training grounds....again. "Yeah, Naruto?" Everyone in Rookie nine & Team Gai, including the sensei's, was now looking back and forth between Sakura and Naruto. "Why is it, that when you leave for missions, you never say good bye to anyone?" Shock and interest in the subject, passed through the small group.

Sakura simply smiled and fingered the heart-shaped locket she was wearing around her neck. "That, Naruto, is a question I was begining to think nobody would ever ask me. I'm glad you asked, though." A sad smile graced her face, as she turned her gaze to the stars above. Sasuke watched with full interest for once.

Sakura kept fingering the locket and kept silent for a few moments. Just when Naruto was starting to think he wasn't going to get an answer, she spoke in a tone that was unusual for her. She sounded confidient and strong. She truly believed in what she was saying.

It was strange to hear her speak in that tone. The look on her face only added to the strangeness, but this was Sakura Haruno. The one and only. And if she was speaking this strongly about something, it meant you would only hear it once, so you best pay attention.

Everyone leant forward a little to hear better. "Good bye lasts forever. I will never lose any of you forever. Therefore, I shall never say good bye. To any of you. Ever. Not even if you're dying. My grandmother tought me that. She called me up one day at the hospital, just to say good bye. She died five minutes later, while shopping in the market place." Her eyes became sad and she opened the locket, revealing a picture of her and her grandmother, smiling carefree. On the other side of the locket, was a picture of Sakura crying over her bloodied grandmother's body.

She got everyone, including Sasuke, to promise to never say good bye. Not even if they were dying.

-

Tsunade could only sigh, she could have never thought that Sakura could get that hurt. _**She should have excpected it.** _Her student. _**Was no super human.** _Her apprentice. _**Was only a human girl. She had her limitations.** _Sakura was so much like her, yet so utterly different at the same time. _**She was strong when she was constantly being beaten down to the point of being weak. She forced herself to be strong, when others could not be.** _"So much love." Tsunade's student did the one thing that no one else could have ever done.

She loved, even after she had no love left to give. She forgave, even if the forgiven didn't deserve it. She gave, when she had nothing left to give. She helped, when she was the one in need of help. She became strong, for those who called her strong when she was weak. She died, when she took the lives of the criminals threatening her home. She became a hero, even though she was alone in the end. She truly did prove her strength, to the entire village.

-

She asked for this. She asked for a mission that she knew would lead to her death. She asked to pick her own team. She wanted this more than anything. She _needed_ this mission more than anything. She even declared that before all the Kages and their council members. She wasn't desperate. She was confident and strong. Determined and mind-set. Everyone in the meeting room agreed to let her do it.

Nobody thought it would end like this. They all thought she would make it out of this alive. She was strong. She was a medic. She surpassed the Hokage, a legendary sanin, Lady Tsunade, in her skills. Both in the medical and ninja fields. She was supposed to come back alive. She was _**ordered**_ to come back alive and well. She was **_ordered_** to live through this mission.

-

"Hokage-sama?"

"Haruno Sakura. Age 23. Blood type: O. Pink hair. Jade green eyes. Pale peach colored skin. Height: 5'4". Weight: 107 pounds. Marital status: Single. Ninja rank: ANBU Elite. Captain of the 1st squad. Main weapon of choice: Large Battle Axe, with cherry blossoms carved into the metal of the blade."

"Baa-chan? Why are you reading us Sakura-chan's personal profile and stats? Did something happen? Where is Sakura-chan anyways?" Tsunade simply ignored Naruto's small outburst and took a shaky breath before continuing. All of Konaha was listening to her. They all deserved to know what happened to the village's one and only cherry blossom, medic-nin.

"Known family: Her mother, Haruno Sakuyo. Currently living. Her father, Haruno Hikaru. Currently living. Her grandfather, Haruno Hitsuguya. Currently deceased. Her grandmother, Haruno Satsuya. Currently deceased. And her older sister, Haruno Sakuna. Currently deceased."

-

Gasps and murmurs spread through the crowd at the mention of Sakura once having an older sister. Sasuke spoke up this time. "Hokage-sama. No disrespect, but what does Sakura's personal files have anything to do with you summoning all of Konaha together? How is any of this of real importance?"

-

Ignoring Sasuke's outburst, just like she did Naruto's, Tsunade continued. "Haruno Sakura. Last mission given: Assemble a team of twelve. Form an attack plan. Take out the Akatsuki. Come home and personally give the Hokage, all the other kages, and all the council members a full mission report." Gasps and stunned looks came from Rookie Nine, Team Gai, and all their respected senseis.

-

All of Rookie Nine, Team Gai, and their senseis claimed to have more important things to attend to, when Sakura came asking for help on her mission. She never told them what the mission was. She said, "Well, I guess this is good bye then....", smiled sadly, and disappeared before her words registered. When the words registered to their minds, they thought they had simply heard things, because the words were nothing more than a whisper in the wind.

-

"Mission accomplished. Report not given. Eleven members of the sent team are assumed MIA, meaning they have yet to be found." Chatter broke lose through the crowd at the news. People tried to put two and two together. "You said twelve people went on the mission, yet only eleven haven't been found. You also said the mission was accomplished. Yet you wasted time reading Sakura's personal file. Who was the person you found? Where is that person now? What is their condition? Can you give us any answers?"

The crowd shouted these things and more, until Tsunade raised her right hand to silence them all. It worked. She had to keep strong and not cry. "Haruno Sakura. Age 23. Blood type: O. Pink hair. Jade green eyes. Pale peach colored skin. Height: 5'4". Weight: 107 pounds. Cause of death: She... Well... She bleed to death."

-

Dead silence. Tsunade choked back a sob and forced herself to be strong enough to continue. "She lost use of her left leg and right arm the day after the battle. Evidence proves she dragged herself, using only her left arm and right leg, all the way back to the village. She dragged herself home, after three weeks of constantly fighting for her life, she finally made it home, to her room. She wrote a diary entry of how she envisioned her death. With all her friends and family there beside her. She wanted me there with her. She wanted to see the pride I had in her. The love I felt for her. She was like a daughter to me. She wanted to watch the clouds as she passed and tell Shikamaru Nara that she finally understood why he watched them."

Tsunade turned her sobbing and broken form to Shikamaru. "She wrote like she was speaking with us. She told you, and I qoute, 'Shikamaru. I finally understand. Why you watch the clouds. It gives a feeling of freedom. You feel like your floating amoung them. All your pain, love, tears, injuries, memories, they're all forgotten. All that matters are the clouds and that freeing feeling you get from watching them'. She wrote that you asked her what she understood and called her a troublesome woman, while doing so. She wrote that you nodded your head in approval to her declaration. She wanted to tell you that when she died. She wanted Sasuke to promise to her hewouldn't go trying to seek revenge. She avenged herself, already. Promise he'd be more social, no matter how annoying it may be. Promise he'd stay alive for her. Promise her he'd find another beautiful girl that he'd fall in love with and eventually marry. Promise to restore his clan with her, whoever she may be. Most of all, Sakura wanted Sasuke to promise he'd NEVER give up on life, their friends, his future family, or Konaha."

-

Sasuke and Shikamaru were in states of shock. Tsunade continued to ball her eyes out in front of the entire village. "Sakura made a joke. During her little story of how she envisioned her death, she mentioned that her bed never looked more inviting. Then she continued with her little envisionment."

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(AN: is that even a word? Oh well. *shrugs* Is now)

-

"Then out of no where, she declared in her writing, that that was it. As soon as she was done writing her last diary entry, she was getting on her bed." A sad laugh escaped Tsunade's lips. "The way she wrote it, made her sound so completely serious, yet at the same time it seemed like she was lightening the weight her envisionment placed on the reader."

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(AN: Ha! See! It's a word now! ~XP)

-

Naruto stepped forward again. "Baa-chan...? This joke isn't funny. Where's Sakura-chan...?" He looked deadly afraid and lost. Like a puppy that just got kicked. Anyone could tell Sakura-chan was his sister-figure. She was his family, just like Sasuke, Sai, Yamoto, and Kakashi. His team was his family. His beloved Sakura-chan couldn't _really_ be gone for good. Could she?

-

The look on Tsunade's face told them everything. She was one hundred percent serious. Haruno Sakura was dead and gone. Nothing was going to bring her back to them now. She was Konaha's Cherry Blossom. Now she will forever be remembered as Konaha's Pink Haired Angel of Life.

-

Under her name, on her gravestone, it read just that.

**_~*~Haruno Sakura~*~_**

**_Konaha's Pink Haired Angel of Life._**

**_Killer of the Akatsuki._**

**_Saviour of us all._**

**_The medic who never quit._**

_**Strong even in death.**_

_~We will love you forever, Sakura-chaaaaan! Never forget your us!_

_~I've always been jealous of you, forehead girl. Guess that's just what bff's are for right? Luv u 4evaz, forehead-chan!_

_~You made me so proud. You were the best pupil I could have ever asked for. See you in heaven!_

-

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Owari

The End


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